Why Couples Fight 3/4

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When things aren’t changing fast enough for you

Mira Kirshenbaum

Mar 23, 20214 min read

When things aren’t changing fast enough for you

You’re working on your relationship, you think, doing everything you can, but nothing seems to make a difference.

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Mira Kirshenbaum

Mar 20, 20214 min read

A power move you can celebrate

Who’d’ve thunk it? Mira Kirshenbaum saying YAY! to a power move. Have I lost my mind?

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A new relationship-saving technology for you

Mira Kirshenbaum

Mar 17, 20215 min read

A new relationship-saving technology for you

With the power move, we disconnect. Without the power move, we connect.

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You may be more into power than you think you are

Mira Kirshenbaum

Mar 16, 20214 min read

You may be more into power than you think you are

There are two huge problems with what we’re hearing about New York Gov. Andrew Cuomo.

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Mira Kirshenbaum

Mar 13, 20214 min read

It DOESN’T have to be this way

What’s the obstacle in the way of making a love-saving revolution in your relationship? There are only two obstacles, really.

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Male professors throwing chairs at female colleagues

Mira Kirshenbaum

Mar 11, 20213 min read

Male professors throwing chairs at female colleagues

Academic books are about power in at least two obvious ways.

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Mira Kirshenbaum

Mar 9, 20214 min read

Oh, the little power moves we make

Tom Brady Says He Tried to ‘Change the Subject’ When Wife Gisele Bündchen Brought Up His Retirement

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Is your relationship being poisoned by power struggles?

Mira Kirshenbaum

Mar 6, 20212 min read

Is your relationship being poisoned by power struggles?

“Yeah, we fight. Everybody fights. But ‘power struggles’? I don’t know. I don’t want to think we’re in that category.”

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Mira Kirshenbaum

Mar 3, 20213 min read

2 whole people = 1 whole relationship

If having a relationship were a game, how would you know your team won? What team? This doesn’t even compute for a lot of people.

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“How do I get you to do what I want you to do?”

Mira Kirshenbaum

Mar 2, 20215 min read

“How do I get you to do what I want you to do?”

Things happen when women want them to. The history of the world is the history of women’s courage.

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Mira Kirshenbaum

Feb 27, 20215 min read

“How do I get you to do what I want you to do?”

As you already know, or feel, housework is a hotbed of power politics. Mostly, the struggle upward away from the jobs no one wants to do.

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Mira Kirshenbaum

Feb 25, 20213 min read

Conflict! Distance!! Unmet needs!!!

Self-help books—unless they’re utterly incoherent—are all built around the same basic plan: Problem. Promise. Program.

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Do you want to go down the road to hell?

Mira Kirshenbaum

Feb 23, 20213 min read

Do you want to go down the road to hell?

And when I say the road to hell, I’m talking about your relationship going down the road to hell.

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How to not blame your parents for the way you are

Mira Kirshenbaum

Feb 22, 20214 min read

How to not blame your parents for the way you are

Let’s say you’re thirty-two years old—or fifty-two years old, whatever!—and you can’t speak Chinese. Who do you blame?

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Should we blame our parents for the way we are now?

Mira Kirshenbaum

Feb 15, 20214 min read

Should we blame our parents for the way we are now?

How much and in what way are our parents responsible for the problems we have in our marriage now?

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The ultimate secret for bringing back love

Mira Kirshenbaum

Feb 12, 20214 min read

The ultimate secret for bringing back love

It’s so simple. You and your partner just sit down and write down the 7 things that make you feel loved.

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Mira Kirshenbaum

Feb 11, 20214 min read

Top 7 Rules for bringing affection back

Affection is just like artistic creativity. When artists start out, they’re pushed forward by a surge of feeling. “I MUST express myself!”

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Mira Kirshenbaum

Feb 8, 20213 min read

The affection you’ve been looking for

Why Couples Fight isn’t really about fighting or power. It’s about love. And the hope of love. And how to keep love alive.

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Mira Kirshenbaum

Feb 6, 20215 min read

Anatomy of a fight

There’s always a history of disempowerment. Jason’s a very successful executive in a job where many of the people he works with are women.

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Imagine having a car that repaired itself!

Mira Kirshenbaum

Feb 4, 20213 min read

Imagine having a car that repaired itself!

What if you can’t solve the problem of not being able to solve your problems? Cars can’t even solve their own problems. If your car...

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If you have an idea for a topic you’d like to see us tackle in a blog post, please, please let us know via Facebook or Twitter. We’d love to hear your suggestions.

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